Cameron Boyd, Australian Centre for the Study of Sexual Assault (ACSSA)
Aware Newsletter, Issue 14, June 2007:
"Real rape, real pain validates the traumatic and abusive nature of partner abuse, and challenges many of the myths that deny or minimise the harm caused by this form of sexual assault. The inclusion of women's stories (including some detailed accounts of abuse) and the jargon-free stye make it widely accessible...As well as being directly accessible to women who have experienced sexual assault by a partner, this could also be a useful resource for counsellors as a way of addressing the profound sense of isolation that women in sexually abusive relationships often feel...By emphasising healing and positive steps that women can take, the book offers hope without denying the horrific and disturbing reality faced by many women."
Shelley McInnis, The Canberra Times, December 16, 2006:
"...Gently encourages her along a healing path, challenging society's denial of the seriousness of her experiences, the ignorance and sexism of perpetrators and condoners of intimate violence, the negative self-talk which can result from this special kind of wounding...Should be welcomed as a worthy contribution to the literature on violence against women."
Dr. Emma Williamson,Women's Aid (UK), SAFE Domestic Violence Quarterly, Summer 2006:
"The authors of this excellent book admirably achieve what they set out to...This is a book written by women for women. It is an excellent training tool for domestic violence workers to begin to understand the relationship between rape and domestic violence and invaluable to women dealing with rape as part of their experiences. The chapters which address trauma make this a good book for counsellors, therapists, and other professionals whose work involves dealing with any form of gendered violence....This book is practical, powerful, and above all, has the power to change, for the better, many women's lives. I would highly recommend this book."
"Finally the first book which addresses the issues that surround partner rape is to be published this September. This is the first book to tackle the issue of partner rape and I can not recommend it highly enough.
As a survivor of partner rape I was both desperate and terrified to reach out for support. Desperate to make sense of what had happened to me and at the same time terrified to speak out for fear of how those around me would react. I had no name for what had happened to me - rape as I understood it was a stranger-danger affair - not something that could happen with someone you were involved with intimately. Unable to speak about it I looked instead for a book that would reflect my experiences and help me deal with them. I scoured book shops and libraries - looked for books both at home and abroad - and found nothing. There were resources for survivors of stranger-rape, date-rape, acquaintance-rape, drug-rape, child abuse and domestic violence but none of those applied to my own situation.
Real Rape Real Pain draws from relevant previous literature on rape and domestic violence but is ultimately based in the experiences of survivors. The book challenges the multitude of myths that surround partner rape, tackles the immense difficulties women face when it comes to naming partner rape and provides practical advice on leaving safely, perusing justice and the many different aspects of healing. Before I read this book I thought I was alone, that what happened to me was my own fault and that my feelings about it were unjustified. Real Rape Real Pain enabled me to name what happened to me - it let me know that what happened to me counted, mattered and that I deserved to heal.
The need for this book is both urgent and overwhelming and I have no doubt of the immense support that it will offer to survivors of partner rape everywhere - it is a light in a terrible darkness."
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